The Flux of 'Home'

       Home is a mysterious thing. How is it that it may move with us at times and remain stationary at others? It can be a palace in the mountains, or a shack in the desert. It is as adaptable as the human race. Samuel Hogan is well aware of the constant flux of the entity we call home.

       For the first two decades of his life, he only ever had one home. It was his parents' house where he was born and raised. He knew every aspect of the building and the surrounding grounds. He was comfortably numb to the flux in discussion. But time dictated that he must leave, and so, he did. In those final weeks at his childhood home, he came to feel the swamp of memories that the land had become. His mind became aware of the way in which his feet dragged through the past, as well as how it had smeared muck all over his being. The mirror on the wall could not show him the true image of what had happened. It could not reveal how his form appeared to be one with the swamp he had long gotten lost in. But his soul whispered it into his ear, and so, the catharsis of departure began.

       With due diligence he packed his belongings. Samuel had become a man who existed as a boy. Something inside of him no longer wished to wait. It urged him to depart earlier so that he may bathe in the pools of unfamiliarity. But Samuel stuck to the initial plan, as if not to upset the balance of nature. However, his heart was pacing about his chest like the stressed in their studies. The flux was unknown, and as the departure drew closer and closer, Samuel found himself more and more entangled in the roots of the swamp. His childhood friends were to remain, and the farewell had never been conceived. None of them, including Samuel, had ever imagined a world without each other. And yet, Samuel was taking it upon himself to seize that particular goodbye.

It made his hairs stand on the edges of the only cliffs they knew. It was the fear of change that came to overwhelm him. His initial conception of his life away from home was one of isolation and sickness. He was absolutely correct.

       Samuel was to leave by train. It was a time-honored method to watch one's home slowly move out of sight. Of course, all he could see was a blurred image of his hometown. He felt the unfamiliar warmth drip down his face and onto his lap. An instinctively curious hand touched and partially absorbed the little manifestations of both his fears and unbridled joy.

       The first night that Samuel spent in the baths of the unfamiliar was a night of lonely sorrow. From his new place of residence, he could see all sorts of people moving about the city. They were a mosaic of humans, bearing all sorts of differences between them. Despite this, Samuel felt as if he did not belong among the masses. He saw himself as the exception to the great acceptance of the land.

       The second night was spent arranging his new place of being. All was put where he wished, and a sense of home began to move towards Samuel's heavy heart. It had become his place, as opposed to his parents'. Possession often increases one's attachment to a piece of property. But still he was lonely, as he had not yet been integrated into the community.

       The third day he stumbled upon a neighbour of his. Like many of the other residents, Madeline was roughly his age. Her features were like those described by a Romantic poet, but there was no Porphyro present. She had been wearing simple grey sweatpants along with a large hooded sweater bearing her university's logo and name. Sweet Madeline had been doing the tedious task of her own laundry for the first time. Her feet were stepping carefully on the steps because the basket of clothing blocked her view of that which lay before her. Samuel had been hastily on his way down when he saw her. His anxious mind instructed him to leave her be, but it was not up to Samuel to decide. A misguided step on Madeline's part essentially threw her basket into him. Both were caught off their guard and stumbled backwards in response. In a matter of minutes, the paramedics had arrived to tend to the unconscious Madeline. Samuel, nearly bedridden with guilt, kept by her side until she recovered. No serious injuries had been sustained, but a great friendship had just begun.

       No more than a week had passed when Samuel had found himself referring to his new residence as his home.

-Zero